Michael speaking on making choices from love and fear
excerpted from a private session with permission
by Victoria Marina-Tompkins

Michael: Many fragments make the mistake of believing that they have no choice in a particular situation and in most cases this is not true. In fact, were they aware of the immeasurably large resources available to them through the true personality and essence then they would see that there are in fact any number of possible responses to any number of what might be considered dilemmas. Take for example a male who currently lives in a rural area just north of Kansas City in the United States. From the time this fragment was a small child he was saddled with many chores which he in fact did not enjoy and was quite chagrined with the prospect of completing them on any given day. When this fragment was a very young infant, he was continually exposed to a stubborn mother who had been ill prepared for the daily and somewhat rigorous task of caring for an infant being only 17 years of age herself, and this emotional demeanor was constant during his time alone with this female fragment. She was known to attempt nursing him but would grow frustrated just as he began to feel comfortable, and this interaction created a dynamic of caution and fear which he then internalized over then next period of years. The mantra of "this is what is required of me even though I do not enjoy this" was the ongoing message sent directly to him from his mother, and one that created dissonance within him along with an essential complacency. Had this interaction continued into his youth, he would have become even more engrained with the attitude of the impossibility of choice, and that it was necessary to give up what one wanted for the good of all.

However, an event did occur which opened this fragment's perception at approximately the age of 14 and one that changed the course of his own life in many ways. When this male child was 14 he was on an afternoon outing with a friend and had spent much of the time worried with fear over the response he would receive when he returned home from the day, expecting fully that the mother fragment would lend a stern warning about play as evil when chores are ignored. As the day drew to a close and it was becoming more and more evident that this fragment needed to return home, he chose to slip in the back door hoping to remain unnoticed. He forgot, however, that his shoes were full of water and squeaked when he walked. Making his way into the kitchen, he caught the eye of his mother who was standing near the cupboard with a small cup in her hand, the last dish of the recent washing after dinner which she had yet to put away. The sight of her young son with watery shoes, squeaking as he attempted to silently slip by her brought a smile to her face, and she smiled and reached out to him to give him a welcome home and an embrace. It was at that moment that the young boy whose name was Grady let go of his fear and made direct contact with his mother, something he had longed to do for many years. He laughed himself, between his tears, and told the story of his afternoon.

This moment of essence to essence contact in fact changed the course of his life as he was then able to trust that it could potentially be acceptable to allow enjoyment into his life, and not always expect the worst. This memory became a resource for Grady, and one which he was able to recall with great delight during his life. He learned to use this event as a reference point for personal growth, and therefore even though he was in the caution mode, he did sometimes choose the lighter path of play and joy based on his early experience.

This example is being used to illustrate how it is possible for a fragment to change a viewpoint to the positive which then allows for the positive poles of the personality to emerge which then allows for a more rich life which then allows for a more rich death which then allows for the potential for a more positive 6th and 7th monad experience. No experience is irrelevant. All experiences add to the overall learning of the soul through the cycles and this includes those which might seem negative or distressing. However, we would think that fragments who are dedicated to a life which includes the balance of true rest, play, study and true work, and a life which allows for essence contact ongoing, are more likely to understand the complexity of the cycle of life, death and reincarnation. It is during the earlier cycles of infant and baby souls that a belief system is set in place which assumes that choices made from joy are dangerous and not to be trusted and in some cases, the work of demons or the devil.

Of course this is fear pronouncing the "truth" which is of course faulty. When fear is strong, the creative resources within a fragment become less available and sometimes completely out of reach, thereby instituting the belief that there are no choices possible except the ones that have already been offered, usually adhering to social standards and customs. Many fragments choose to follow the dictates that will provide social acceptability which is necessary for survival in the earlier cycles and even in the later ones as well depending on the dynamics or setting and choose then to ignore the inner voice of essence which is faint or unheard or relegated to the depths of the psyche in order to avoid bringing disruption into the life.

Most fragments can upon review locate moments in their own lives where decision were made that altered the course of their lives. Many times such decisions are viewed through the lens of remorse, the road not taken. There are of course also moments in a life where a fragment chose to enlist the support of the true personality and essence, letting go of what might have been perceived as the obvious choice in exchange for one that fit the blossoming life task more securely or one that activated agreements which led to positive events in the life. Such a review is a good first step for any fragment who might wish to understand the process of choice more clearly and who might wish to begin to establish patterns of positive choice that is essence related. This suggestion is akin to the process of photographing the chief feature but here is photographing choices made, and whether they were from fear masquerading as responsibility or from love which is simply love.

Choices that are made from love rarely have the complications associated with those choices made from fear. Choices based on agape which is unconditional love in the truest sense of the word do not have the trademark of fear which can include indecision, confusion, and apprehension. Choices made from fear can also include arrogance, opinions based on judgment and intolerance in the negative, abuse of power, haste, momentary fervor, and decisive action based on control. We think that these fear based choices can masquerade as good sense, those choices made for the good of all concerned when in fact they are nurtured by fear as the basis and foundation of the choice itself. Those choices made from love are often clear and unobtrusive, seeking neither approval or requiring conditions. Choices made from unconditional love do not require anything, but instead are made with the ally of the true personality and essence. Choices made from love feel like fresh air while choices made from fear feel seductively inclusive and all powerful, or retreating and undermining of the truest expression of essence.

Choices made from fear often feel contaminated with energies that are not clear, and in fact are tangled and muddied with negative emotions and compliance. We think that a fragment can begin to ascertain whether a choice is made from fear or love by asking the question " am I making this choice without conditions?". We think this might be a place to start. It is the personality which implements the conditions and it is the chief feature that is the architect.

Fragments are often more free of imprinting either as young children or as older adults. Therefore we would suggest a study of the actions of young children to begin. One example might be the sharing of an ice cream cone without the concern of whether there will be enough, the instantaneous laughter of a child who delights when licked in the face by a puppy or kitten, the amusement of an infant when discovering his or her toes for the first time. We are illustrating responses here, for it is the response which first indicates whether the next choice will be from love, fear, or indifference which is the negative of fear. On the other hand, a child who has witnessed the parents arguing over possessions might be more likely to defend the ice cream for fear that there will never be another one, cower with clenched fists when a puppy approaches after seeing his older brother being chased albeit innocently by a neighboring canine and screaming all the way. Life is the greatest teacher and it is through the experiences of the physical plane that a fragment learns response. Before the cycle of incarnations begins there is only love as the entity and the cadre know only the limitless cycles of bliss within the larger being of the Tao.

Fragments who are willing to embrace the concept of choice might begin with the inquiry into patterns of personal response and this could include under what circumstances love is experienced and under which fear is dominant. Love expands, fear contracts. Love embraces for there is no separation, fear creates distance, love regards with compassion, fear regards only with contempt and false judgments. Recognizing this process is a powerful and decisive first step in creating choices made from love rather than fear, and this can also begin with the first step of validating which experiences are based in compassion and openness, and which are chosen from fear and are closed. As we have said, life is a rehearsal for life, and this is true in every moment.

Understanding the choices made during life then enables a fragment to make choices related to death more astutely, and even the astral interval transition post death can be more smooth if the life most recently lived was more true than not.


© 2003 Victoria Marina-Tompkins

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